DETECT is a new technology from Zenda Technologies that is supposed to be able to detect Alzheimer’s disease at its early stages. The whole thing seems a little fishy to me, though. Personally, I think it’s a trap. I’m guessing that Zenda realized that old people are developing an affinity for video games. From there they decided that they could lure them into some sort of testing that involves jamming a helmet on their head, telling them that they have Alzheimer’s, and starving them to death. I’m sure the government is behind this in some way, and I would make sure that they pay, but I’m kind of a fan of this whole “kill the elderly” initiative. They’ve been hogging all of that wheeled-chair and liquid-food technology for years. It’s time that us young’ns got a chance to experience the wonders of the lazy, no-chew required lifestyle.