Square-Enix and Suntory Limited have teamed up to deliver what scientists are calling a “Miracle Potion”. It is a real-life reproduction of the life-giving tonic found in the Final Fantasy series of games. Suntory Limited is claiming that it has the ability to “heal any wound, and restore all magical powers to the imbiber of the liquid”. Well, I’ve tried it for myself, and let me tell you: do not shoot yourself in the ankle, and then try to heal it with a Final Fantasy branded beverage. You will be disappointed, and possibly thrown into septic shock. Also, that 12 year old on the corner is probably not an official representative of Suntory Limited. I did, however, find that this beverage is perhaps the best beverage substitute for a sex-toy that I’ve tried yet. Take that Sunny Delight!